Monday, April 20, 2009


I've been pondering how much I should share in this kind of forum. I'm a little wary of things being 'out there' and I know hubby doesn't like me writing about our personal life. Fair enough.
But this means that I haven't posted in a long time. No crafting news. No creativity documented.
I have, however, had things on my mind. I've written about Moo the 'spirited child.' She's great fun but she's also A LOT of work. And since she hasn't been sleeping during the day like she used to there's been limited time for me to do things I can't when she's awake. During school holidays it's worse - no creche! Anyhoo....
The main thing that's been plaguing me is that we have been on the TTC roller coaster for over 6 months. Our first pregnancy was a 'surprise' so we hadn't experienced deliberately trying to have a baby. Our second pregnancy was also a 'surprise,' in that we got pregnant first try and then soon lost it. That was last October and we have been trying since. If any of you have been through this before you can understand. This really hasn't been too long when I see how long some people try (some in vain : ( and I know that we 'are lucky because we already have a child' but that doesn't change the fact that we want a brother or sister for Moo. I'm a bit of a focused person sometimes so this has been (in this case) a bad thing. Obsessive POAS from 12 DPO - and if you can understand what I just wrote it is possible that you too may be a little obsessive and we should start a club called 'POAS anonymos.' ha ha ha
Last week I was feeling a little upset and hubby suggested I go out with one of my friends. Yes, I said, my two best friends are pregnant, both my SIL are pregnant and all my Mum's group friends are pregnant or just had babies. ALL OF THEM!
I'm banning myself from using the computer for anything other than blogging and emailing so that I can't wallow in my misery with others who are on the same rollercoaster.
And whatever you do, don't leave a comment saying, 'Don't worry, it will happen', or 'Just relax.' or I will have to hunt you down.....

PS - If you happen to be a 'best friend' or SIL please understand I am totally happy for you and want to hear all about your beautiful belly! Don't tip toe around me and pretend like you don't have a giant tummy poking out in front of you - there's a complete difference between my longing for a child and my happiness at having another bundle of joy around.... : ) I love you guys!


clareb said...

This post brought back a lot of memories for me, it's a rough time when everyone's knocked up but you. If you ever want to chat about it on the phone please call me, I have full sympathy & won't ever say "just relax and it will happen" (just makes you want to punch 'em doesn't it).
Love Clare xxxx
PS. I don't know what POAs and DPOs are :)
PPS. I too am learning what a "spirited child" is. But at least she often sleeps for 6hrs in a row now.

Cindy said...

Sending you postive thoughts to help you get through it. I know it can be a long hard road to travel. Brave you for keeping going.

A said...

If you are wondering...? POAS is 'pee on a stick' and DPO is 'days post ovulation.'

Thanks for the thoughts - it helps.

: )